Sorry For The Slow Blog Week

I have been so consumed with my personal life that I have neglected all of my loyal readers. For the remainder of the week thing will probably remain slow.

Like I said earlier I am going through the process of divorce which I might add has not been easy.

Just out of curiosity those of you who are married answer me this. If your spouse served you walking papers how long would you continue to live with them? I asked mine to leave the day I gave him the paperwork. I had to get a court order because he refused after 3 months finally today I have been liberated from the control from "Czar David". I am beside myself. I am a cleaning maniac and I have been rearranging the furniture. I just hope my kids do well with the new living situation. I guess in a house full of lions there is no room for a crab.

I hope to be back to my humorous blogging self in about a week.

Nick's Quiz

1.What time did you get up this morning? 4am

2.Diamonds or Pearls? Diamonds baby Diamonds

3.What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Chicken Little

4.What is your favorite TV show? My Name Is Earl

5.What did you have for breakfast? Sausage Egg & Cheese Tornadoes from Speedway

6.What is your middle name? Marie (I'm Named after Elvis' Daughter)

7.What is your favorite cuisine? Italian/Mexican/Chinese

8.What foods do you dislike? PEAS! Liver & Onions

9.What is your favorite Potato chip? Sour Cream & Onion

10.What is your favorite CD at the moment? Chevelle (Can't Remember the title)

11.What kind of car (truck) do you drive? Dodge Caravan

12.What is your favorite sandwich? BLT

13.Favorite item of clothing? Sweatshirts/jeans

14.If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Ireland

15.What color is your bathroom? Blue Black & White with Rubber Ducks I have kids Remember

16.Favorite brand of clothing? Gap/Old Navy

17.Where would you want to retire to? Arizona

18.Favorite time of day? anytime after my nap

19.Where were you born? Milwaukee

20.Favorite sport to watch on TV? Tennis

21.Who do you least expect to send this back? Aaron

22.Person you expect to send it back first? Ericka

23.What type of detergent do you use? Era everything else make me itch

24.Coke or Pepsi? Caffine Free Pepsi

25.Are you a morning person or a night owl? Night Owl

26.What size shoe do you wear? 9

27.Do you have pets? Yes

28.Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with everyone? Not a thing

29.What did you want to be when you were little? A Doctor

30.Favorite candy bar? Kit Kat/Butterfinger Crisp

31.What is your best childhood memory? Telling my mother her tuna casserol tasted like dog food.

32.Different jobs you've had in your life? Cashier/Forklift Drive/Administrative Assistant/Paper Carrier

34.What color underwear are you wearing? Purple I think

35.Nicknames: None that I know of

36.Piercings? 4

37.Ever been to Africa? No

38.Ever been toilet papered? No, but I have done some tping

39.Love someone so much it made you cry? Yes

40.Ever been in a car accident? Passenger sideswiped by a semi when I was 6

41.Croutons or bacon bits? Pork fat Rules

42.Favorite day of the week? Saturday

43.Favorite restaurant? Don't get out enough to have a favorite

44.Favorite flower? Roses/Sunflowers

45.Favorite ice cream? Butter Pecan.

46.Disney or Warner Brothers? Warner Brothers

47.Favorite fast food restaurant? Arby's

48.What color is your bedroom carpet? Grey

49.How many times did your fail you drivers test? Twice

50.Before this one, from whom did you get your last email? Jill

51.Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Target

52.What do you most often do when you are bored? Sleep

53.Who are you most curious about their responses to this questionnaire? It depends on if I send this to anybody

54.Last person you went to dinner with? My Kids

55.Ford or Chevy? Neither

56.How many tattoos do you have? 1

57.Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Chicken

58.How many people are you sending this survey to? 0

Highly Qualified Scientists?

You Guessed It!!

I am trying to modify the template here. I was getting a ton of script errors here so I will have the new and improved blogrolls up probably tomorrow at the latest.

A Woman's Side of The Story

I Recently read a blog post from Aaron. I thought one link in particular was quite interesting and here is my take on the support issues (You may want to read linked post before proceeding).

Dear Technical Support,

Recently I have been having trouble with your Husband 4.0 program. (Note that Husband 4.0 is a utility program and upgrade from Boyfriend 7.0) I upgraded from Boyfriend 7.0 about 4 years ago. In the beginning the program was fantastic I loved Money Machine utility. Though the do simple household tasks utility was flawed. I also noticed upon installation I acquired the "Couch Potato Virus" and Norton says it can not delete it. I am currently uninstalling the software due to other virus issues in the last year I have acquired the following:

Inconsideration Worm
Lying32.Exe
Coming home late Trojan
Infedelity.vbx

I hope that in the near future you will have valuable security updates to fix these problems to make things better for the companion program that runs under the Wife 1.0 OS.

Sincerely,

A Disgruntled Husband 4.0 User

The City of Chocolate Is Cleaner Than Milwaukee??

I find it hard after Katrina that New Orleans can be a cleaner city than Milwaukee but I guess its because MMSD dumped all of that raw sewage into Lake Michigan.

Readers Digest Lists The 50 Cleanest Cities based on metropoititan areas.

Mckinley Beach

Boat Sailing in raw sewage Lake Michigan

Voting Machine

I think all of us right wingers will appreciate this one.

This is Why Beer Pong Should Be Outlawed

BBC Reports that 2 drunk college kids mailed a hamster. Later to be discovered by a postman unharmed. I have posted a photo of the envelope it chewed through. So stupid you know when you mail animals you should put them in a cardboard box. DUH!

Stardate 1/21/2006 Sale Of Kidney Stone For Charity

The Golden Palace Strikes Again



This is the same place that purchased the Britney Spears ABC gum and the old grilled cheese sandwich. It is the most recent strange purchase that has me baffled why on earth would a casino want to display a kidney stone and William Shatner's to boot. Well they didn't pay too much for it only $25,000.

New Superhero?

I took a trip over to Eabums World today and found this a truly gifted guy I must say.
I will assume that because this video is titles "The Beginning" that there will be more.
I too would use this gift to fight evil :)

Harald & Kumar Go Dating

I hope you guys like this one because I was cracking up.

I don't think I will ever eat curry & rice again.

Death By Fruit

I regularly read the daily "Snopes" well this morning a few of these off the wall articles have come to my attention.

Like this one a woman in Slovenia who survived the Nazi camps apparently was taken down by my favorite yellow fruit.

I'll Take that To Go Please

I guess only in Canada.

CBC Reports that a fox stole a 15 year old boy's cappuccino.

Teen Drivers Need Survivor Training

I saw this on the TODAY show this morning. A horrifying 911 call about a teen trapped underwater in a car. Ok My first instinct would be "Holy Crap" and then I would be rolling the windows down in mid air as fast as humanly possible. Did this chick ever watch Fear Factor? I have had dreams about this maybe I'm just weird or maybe it's because I have kids. Or maybe its was that one time I almost went over the Hoan I don't know. They should really teach this to people who live in a place surrounded by water. Anyway on the show you could actually see the car under water so they were not that far down. If the car was filling up with water wouldn't it be "equalized" of course I understand that when the car gets wet the power windows don't work. Couldn't she have just opened the door?

Darn I'm A Worm Again

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT... :(

Super Robot Monkey Team Huh?

My kids are going crazy for this new cartoon. Yeah I watched it with them because I always try to catch some of the stuff they like. Now I am a toon head and pretty good with useless knowledge and irreverent trivia. While Watching this show I was listening to one of the robot monkeys talk and the voice sounded very familiar. Well I just had to go to the website to find out who the red monkey is. I just about died. I'm surprised this Michael Jackson supporter still gets work who do you think it is???

COREY FELDMAN of the "Corey's" To think I used to got see their movies on the release nights man did I not have a life as a teenager.

OOOH He is also recording a solo album I don't think I can live without that.

When I Was a Kid Gay Meant Happy

OK I realize that there is no "Coming out of the closet" these days. Everyone is entitled to there opinion but this is sacrilegious Queer Church? Why not be more politically correct and call it the Gay and Lesbian Church of Milwaukee or something? I have to say I am offended by the word Queer. I don't have a problem with people who choose this lifestyle. My uncle was gay and he died of AIDS and I dont think at any time he ever said he was queer just gay but I was like 6 so I just thought he was happy. Maybe I'm just talking out of both sides of my mouth again...

Something Strange Happens Everyday

On my Sunday run this morning everything seemed to be going real smooth. Typically I encounter assorted wildlife and the occasional drunk on my route. I was finishing up the 1st route and stopped to deliver a paper to a house that has a dog. Most days this dog is indoors, I know the dog it's friendly well today very friendly. It's an Alaskan Malamute keep in mind that I am 5"3" so when this animal mounted me is was a shock. I couldn't figure out why but I remembered that I was at my dad's the night before and probably had the scent of his 2 chiuahuas (SP) on me. I should probably carry some biscuits to throw at them so they leave me alone.

Read This Blog Watch This Video!!!

I have to give props to the dude at Neo-Con* Tastic. Please Watch the "Penn & Teller Vs PETA" video. This guy is definitely going on the blogroll.

Granted I am not almost a vegetarian by choice. I am starting to get really sick of the 2 faced people in this world.

I'm Evolving

I have noticed that I have evolved Yippie!!! Well at the beginning of the week I was just a insignificant microbe in the TTLB Ecosystem yesterday a wiggly worm and today I have grown legs I am a crunchy crustacean. Wow I guess its been a good week for links.

Is John Lennon More Important Than The Pope

I was listening to the news today to hear that the man who tried to assassinate Pope John Paul II was released from jail. Ok so the pope lived and the guy did his time. Why hasn't the guy who shot John Lennon been released yet? I mean the Pope is a major religious figure and John Lennon was just a singer. What Up???

Was Tobacco Settlement Really Worth It?

I was talking to my uncle on the phone last night. He by the way is a truck driver. We were actually on a really weird topic about potato chips and who were the 2 biggest manufacturers are. I could only think of Frito Lay and then the rest I mentioned were all local by local I mean in the Midwest.

Later in the conversation I had mentioned that Kraft was a big company and if he ever delivered their stuff. He said yeah and that they were owned by Phillip Morris, they are the company who makes Marlboro Cigarettes. Well due to the tobacco settlement we are now paying a little more for our Mac & cheese. Now they have passed the price change on to every consumer who buys any Kraft product. I'm sure the non-smokers are going to boycott the the stuff now. LOL

Dont Kiss Your Chicken Before They Hatch

Yeah just what we need some more bird flu info.

Well I Wanted to Look at something Different

I changed the blog I combined a couple templates into one I wanted to try to be a little different I am still trying to figure out how to give the sidebar spots.

Blogrolls Please...

He you guys have been talking about the ole blogrolls for some time now is there an easier way than copying and pasting it?

Just wondering

Do Yourself A Favor Don't Ever Get Married, Because Divorce Really Sucks

I hate to get personal here but this is really irritating me today. We will start from the beginning. Seven years ago I met this guy. We dated and 3 months later I find out that I was pregnant. At the time we both decided that we would move in together because of the coming baby.

The baby was born and during my maternity leave he injures himself at work. At this time we worked the same shift working as a team to care for household tasks and the baby. 3 years go by I start noticing that he is withdrawing from all family functions and acting very strange to me. This man never wants to discuss anything.

We agree to get married to make things official, 2 months later after having an enjoyable time with our child he tells me he is moving out. It turns out there is another woman I found out via the cell phone bill. He injures himself at work again. I hire a lawyer and file for divorce.

Thanksgiving day I find out that I am pregnant again I tell him and he says "Well get rid of it" I did not, I was diagnosed with a rare form of kidney disease that could inhibit me from possibly having more children so I decided that God was giving me one more chance. A few months later I get a call at 6am having a revelation he says he wants to move back into the house with me and the coming baby. Apparently grass wasn't greener on the other side. I agree to give it another chance for the sake of the children.

Granted during this period of time I have never cheated on this man but am not going to lie I definitely though about it. I believe I was treated like crap and taken for granted. I forgot to mention that in August of 2003 he was injured in a car accident.

On my anniversary August 1st 2005 I found some interesting data on his computer. As a gift I was going to reformat the drive because earlier in the week he said he was having problems with the computer.

I found numerous e-mail from personals websites and I also noticed he was getting messages from the women there. I confronted him with the situation and he said nothing has come of it. I filed for divorce again on the 4th of August some anniversary present.

Here is the sick part. In Milwaukee County if there is no domestic violence in the home neither party is required to leave. I ended up having to go to a hearing to get a court order to get him to vacate the home. Any normal guy would have packed his things and hit the road. Notice I have already stated in this post he has injured himself 3 times already??? Well he managed to injure himself at work again for the 4th time. So I was stuck at home with the moron for a month yeah I could have gone and done something but that is impossible when you don't have the funds. Oh not to forget injury number 3 he hired a lawyer for a workman's com/Personal injury case. He was awarded money in November which I was never told about and we are still legally married I am guessing about 30,000. Well hopefully my final is on the 26th of this month I will get my share of the money. I know it's chump change but it will pay my car off. I will also have my sanity back because finally after 6 months of requesting him to leave he finally will be

AMEN!!!

A Jedi Yet You are Not

I am a bigtime Star Wars GEEK!! Who wouldn't want the power of "The force". Hence the reference to this article.

If I had one of these I would definitely play tricks on my friends.

Pay Them Back One Penny at a Time

Apparently we are not the only nation that is irritated with outsourcing. You know when you call a company and the person on the other end is in another country.

I found this article in the oddly enough section (Reuters UK).

Maybe we in the US should start paying our bills like this. It was a good chuckle for me.

Enjoy!!!!

By Kamakshi Tandon
TORONTO (Reuters) - A Canadian credit card holder is putting a new twist on an old trick practised by disgruntled debtors -- repaying his bill in pennies to maximise the collector's inconvenience.
Unhappy when his Canadian bank began outsourcing some of its credit card processing to the United States, the man lodged his protest via the bank's online payment system, jamming its computers by making dozens of tiny payments a day.
Don Rogers said he was worried that anti-terrorism laws in the United States could allow the U.S. government to access his data without his consent.
"I don't want the CIA or George Bush to know how many cases of Viagra I bought last week, or what church or charities I donate to," he told Reuters.
Rogers said his card has since been cancelled by Vancouver-based Citizens Bank, but he will continue paying his remaining balance of C$1,000 (490 pounds) one little bit at a time.
He has also decided to run in the January 23 federal election as a candidate for a fringe party that wants to abolish the North American Free Trade Agreement linking Canada, the United States and Mexico.
Citizens Bank spokesman Rolf Baumbusch said such outsourcing was commonplace among Canadian banks because there were "very limited opportunities" for doing the work in Canada. Canada's federal privacy commissioner has ruled the practice is legal as long as customers are informed.
But Canadians should be aware of cross-border privacy issues, said Arthur Cockfield, a law professor at Queen's University in Kingston, Ontario
"More and more our personal information is being rendered into digital formats and zips around the world," he said, adding that any credit card data sent to the United States is subject to U.S. law.
Roger's initial attempt at paying in pennies produced a statement over 32 feet long, according to media reports.

RE: "Jump the Couch"

I have been getting replies about the Tom Cruise post, for your reading pleasure you may view assorted definitions for "Jump the Couch:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jump+the+couch

I cant Forget the Slot Machine Addicts

Yes I really do have too much time on my hands these days. My daughter is back at school and my son continues his obsession with Spiderman & Darth Vader so this morning I have a wee bit of a break.

Yes its true here is all you need to know about slot machines. There are some interesting links on the sidebar of this page too, like how to waste $20 in a slot maching the good way, if there really is a good way. If it was me, seeing I am such a conservative gambler it would be in the denominations of pennys and nickels and I really hate the nickel.

Speaking of penny's, this one time... at band camp...

More Time to Read the Candy Blog

You all know by now that I will practically eat anything that ends in toes.

My astrological sign is Leo and according the the book "The only Astrology Book You Will Ever need" It says my mineral is salt.

I ran into another cool blog today all about JUNKFOOD!!!

Oh, here is another amusing link about Strange New Products Live Nude Feet with Topless Sandals :)

Buy weird stuff http://www.mcphee.com/

The One That Ruined His Career

Don't get me wrong Vin Diesel Is HOT!!! But I think he should have skipped "The Pacifier" and did XXX2 and 2Fast 2Furious.

I rented the Pacifier and my kids liked it but I though the action sequences really looked animatronic. Oh, lets not fogret his cheesy Navy Seal impersonation.

Looking Back at Nostalgic Candy

I watched Charlie & the Chocolate Factory, well today my daughter wanted to watch the original.

Ok, i'm 32 years old and the movie is 35 years old but it took me back a little bit. I started remembering the candy I used to eat as a kid.

The Marathon Bar: braided Caramel dipped in chocolate

Chuckles: flavored jelly candy kinda like orange slices but different flavors

Candy Cigarettes: with the dust so when you blew into them it would look like smoke

Chocolate cigarettes (Now I think I know why I smoke all of that darned candy)

Chico Sticks: Like a butterfinger but without the chocolate

If any of you out there are interested they still sell this stuff. I don't know if there is a candy store here in West Allis but if there is please comment on it I would love to share some of my old time favorites with my kids.

Here is a link to a good place on the web that has it all!!! I answered my self here I had no idea this place is on Oak Creek Duh!!!

Here is a blog devoted just to candy how cool!!

To the Families of the Trapped Miners

Godspeed!

I have been watching the coverage of the rescue on the news today. I hope that they are able to find them dead or alive, just so the families will have closure to the situation.

My heart goes out to all of them they are in our prayers.

Movie Review - Charlie & The Chocolate Factory

Yeah I just rented it on DVD. For those of you without kids make your own decision.

If you like TimBurton it's classic very dark. Jonny Depp was disturbingly eerie like Edward Scissorhands eerie it was odd to see his mouth so full of teeth. The movie was very similar to the original but with a little less singing.

3 out of 5 stars

Slang Of the Day

Not only is Tom Cruise a Scientologist and actor, now he is coining new slang phrases.



"Jump the couch" I'm sure everybody has seen his off the hook antics on Oprah. I know it made me laugh. I think he might have had some bad engrams after that one. He's not clear anymore.

I'm gonna give this a shot in some sentences to see if we get the idea.

Oh, my Boston Store bill just came. My husband is going to "Jump the couch" over this.

Danny forgot to take his meds today I think he is going to "Jump the couch"

Just plain fun I think I will overuse it like some of the other top words of the year like "Katrina, Rita, and Tsunami.

I just moved from Indonesia to Louisiana not only did I suffer the aftermath of the tsunami but also hurricane Katrina and Rita now I think I am going to "Jump the couch"

Ok I think I got them all.

Mullet Hunting is a Sport Apparently

Well you learn something new everyday. I was just perusing my links at the side of the page to the Disgruntled Car Salesman and for shits n giggles I checked out his profile. He has in his list of interests "Mullet Hunting" I clicked on that and apparently he is not the only one who does this. Well all I have to say is those people should come to "Stallis" because it's like the home of the mullet. When I moved here about 5 years ago I thought I was south of the Mason Dixon Line. I have noticed more of the following here than any other place I have lived.

1. Many severely obese people

2. People who are trapped in the Glam era i.e. still wear leather jackets with fringes

3. Mullets

4. A lot of blind people with seeing eye dogs there is one woman who I see on a regular basis and It still blows my mind that she doesn't burn herself when she lights her cigarette.

5. Sega genesis fanatics